July 2017
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curviness / enough sleep! / tbg fan meeting!


Thank you for all the reassurances, my lovely friends -- I realized that I am ovulating, so I will delay any panic until two or three days from now.

At least that fear awoke in me the realization that, deeeeeeep down inside, I really do love my body just the way it is. I pictured myself with a flat belly and breasts two cups smaller, and thought that I would NOT find that body attractive. Nope, not even with just my belly flat, I wouldn't like it.
This is the most beautiful belly ever (owned by a professional belly dancer, so there's nothing un-fit about it!):
not mine

...and yet when I imagine that I am that woman, all of a sudden the belly looks too fat to me. But less so, now. I am actually (slowly) getting rid of my 'fat' complex, and that makes me so very very happy.

And then I decided that since I felt positive about my body being the same or even a little curvier, I bought myself one of these for the 80 millionth time...

That is the yummiest candy bar ever invented -- it's the love child of the Mr. Butterfinger and Miss Kit-kat, all the yumminess, none of the stick-in-your-teeth annoyance, and the most delightful texture. (and by the way, I'm not fond of chocolate. I only eat it with peanut butter or mint)

--------

I actually got enough sleep last night, and it made my whole day at work delightful. I was in such a good mood and I didn't feel like faking a faint just to be allowed to go home. Even though it was a VERY slow day. I think I'll make sleep more of a priority.

---

Yesterday, a guy bought a Jeremy Camp CD, and I mentioned that Jeremy is married to the lead singer of my favorite band.
guy: "The Benjamin Gate?"
me: *mouth falls open*
me: "you... you know who the Benjamin Gate is???"
guy: "Yeah, they're awesome!"

... mad fan-gabbing ensued, making me so freakin' delighted you wouldn't believe it. When I realized he was a fan, I wanted to HUG him! I've NEVER randomly met a TBG fan in real life before! I also wanted to get all his contact info and become friends, but I refrained. ;-)

---

...and Happy Birthday, nikare!!!
feelings: pleased
sounds: Massive Attack: "Teardrop"
connecting: , ,


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on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.