February 2018
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how the quitting went

so, I finally talked to Polly... she came up to my register and told me to come talk to her before I took my 15, then went to the back. I was so nervous talking to her right then that I was shaky. Anyway, they sent me a replacement and I went to lock up my drawer, and asked Laura if she wanted me to go talk to Polly and then come back to her and tell her when I went on my 15, and Laura looked at me and said, "No, I know you'll only be gone for 15 minutes. Just go talk to her and then go wherever you want." (she took more words to say it though) I was so flattered, really, because for a person of her personality type to waste time saying something unnecessary is quite a compliment. And then I was walking to the back, thinking that I've never worked with such wonderful managers and I'm really going to miss them (except Jayme, who is NOT a good manager. A good manager puts their employees' well-being first. But I'm rarely scheduled at the same time as she is).

As I was about to walk into the back, I prayed frantically for peace and that it would go smoothly and well...

So I sat down and explained, saying that I've been out a few times in the past month because I've been going to counseling because I was sexually abused as a child, and a lot of times a session will leave me feeling sick for the rest of the day. And Ben and I have decided that I need to be out for a while to concentrate on healing, so I'm going to have to leave, even though I love working there.

I expected a guilt trip or irritation or suspicion or "okay bye" -- but she suprised me. She agreed earnestly that I should take time to concentrate on healing, and she asked me how long I'd been there, said she could get me medical leave if I had been there six months (but I haven't, I've been there three months)... and I'm not sure if it was the lighting, but she even looked a little teary-eyed. She was very supportive and caring, and ended up telling me to just give her a note for two weeks notice, and she'd make it so I could be hired back. She amused me by referring to it as 'resigning' rather than 'quitting.' heh heh.

Oh the loads of stress that took off my back!!! I don't have to be sad, because I can work there again as soon as I'm ready, and nobody's going to hate me or think me irresponsible or lazy for taking time out. And I really respect Polly and didn't want to disappoint her, so I'm very glad that she was supportive.

P.S. check out my updated userinfo and journal! I replaced the images with far, far better versions. I'm especially proud of how I did the text on the userinfo portrait.

feelings: relieved
sounds: The Benjamin Gate: "Do What You Say"

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pinkstrands ══╣╠══
wow. understanding managers are the best.
i hope all goes well.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
thanks. ;-)
oblyvia ══╣╠══
I'm glad everything went OK for you. Taking care of yourself, especially your inner-self is so important, and doing it with a clear conscious just makes it that much better.

Beautiful journal, BTW.
belenen ══╣beautiful╠══
thank you!
darkpool ══╣╠══
Glad to hear that went well.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
acid_burns ══╣charlie beauty╠══
Now go take care of yourself :)
belenen ══╣comfort╠══
thank you. *hugs you*
eternitywaiting ══╣woohoo╠══
I'm really glad it all went well....and I was hoping your manager would leave you an open door for a return, since I know how much you enjoy it there. :-)
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
thank you! ;-)
duchesse20 ══╣Full body╠══
Very happy to hear that everything went smoothly for you at work! It feels great to have people support! :)

Now is your time. Take good use of it and heal yourself as fast as you can! ;)
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
thank you sweetie!
mental_coercion ══╣╠══
You did quite a good job on your userinfo. So many details, lol! I haven't commented for a while, but I hope you're doing well (sorry about that, been a bit caught up with uni!). I'm still here though. I hope I haven't missed anything too major..? >_
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
*hugs* Glad to see you're still around! I know how school can keep you whirling, no need to apologise.
angeleyes831 ══╣╠══
yay, glad it went well with your manager and you resigning, at least you know you can go back and sometimes that is worth so much more
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
yes, it is! Thank you.
moody_godess ══╣╠══
im glad that went well for you. i know you were really worried about 'resigning' :) and quite nervous about telling your boss. glad it went well. and that she was so understanding. means you'll have a job to come back to when youre ready...always a good thing.

question though, cuz im a curious cat. why did you get so detailed with her regarding your resignation? i probably woulda just said personal reasons and be done with it. i didnt realize you were close to your boss to divulge such to h er....or perhaps *and very likely* you are more free with your experiences than i. ....just curious. :)

im glad you got that over with though so u dont have to worry about it anymore. and now can concentrate on healing and do what you need to do with counseling.
belenen ══╣shimmering╠══
Why did I get so detailed? Well, I have no qualms about telling anyone about my sexual abuse -- in fact, I kinda think of it as a good thing (though I don't just go around telling people) because people in general are unaware of how common it is, and I think the more people understand what a huge problem it is in our society, the more people will do stuff about it.

Also, I wanted her to understand that I had good reason -- 'personal problems' could be taken for a lie.

Mainly because if I hadn't told her that, I'd have felt like I was lying or hiding the truth, and that would have been bad for me.
anar_anar ══╣╠══
that is so awesome, how understanding she was... ahh... very very cool :) and I do like the text... the "truth is beauty" ! yes yes!
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
thank you!!!
shespoke ══╣╠══
I'm so glad that that went well for you. It can surprize you how caring people can be sometimes, even from the ones you least expect. She sounds like she has a good heart. I'm glad that you'll be able to go back when you want and that everything worked out.

PS. I really like the new userinfo and your journal layout seems to "flow" better if that makes any sense. :)
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
thank you! and thanks about the journal too. ;-)
misemifein2 ══╣╠══
Now why on earth should it surprise you that people want you to be healed and happy?

I checked out your userinfo and now I know more about you! Kayaking, horseriding and... goat farming! Although horse-riding sounds familiar. Maybe they never sunk in the first time.

I used to ride horses when I was younger, I remember riding along a beach on a sunny afternoon/evening, and riding through the waves. It's a nice memory.

I'm going to go and read your life story again, if it's still about, suspect I've forgotten more than I should have.
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
oooh, wow. I've only ridden in a corral, once in a field, and once on a trail... I'd love to 'freestyle' it... and down a beach... that's like a scene from a movie!

You read my life story? I'm so incredibly flattered! And even more so that you are planning on reading it again! (though I need to update it now that I know more about my childhood)
aubkabob ══╣╠══
and i'll be here every step of the way that you'll have me, in order to help with your healing in whatever way i can (given my remote location and schtuff...)

i'm happy it went smoothly, that gives you so much less to have to worry and stress about *hugs*
belenen ══╣comfort╠══
*kissies and hugs* Your remote location can be fixed, you know... even temporarily! alariya and I want to hang out with you!
aubkabob ══╣╠══
it's definitely something i would LOVE to do, it's something that i feel that i NEED to do.

maybe this fall? we'll see. i still have to deal with that stupid bankruptcy.
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.