September 2017
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mourning bracelet for alariya / conflict with hannah / love for my wonderful friends


I ♥ hannah. I love hannah. HELLO WORLD I LOVE HANNAH!!!!!!!! and Alariya!!!

OMG I have the best friends, the best people! in my life. I'm so fucking lucky! no, blessed! Thank you God/dess! (I don't believe God has gender so until I come up with a good name for her/him I will use the both-gender version) My lover and husband frenetik, my soulfriend shioneh, my heart-sister alariya, my wonderful amazing lj-friends (I started to list but it got ridiculously long!)... I really do have the best people in my life. Hey! That's my superwoman talent! I draw fascinating people. ;-D

I've been spending a lot of time with alariya lately, which has been sad and painful because of what she's going through, but also amazing because we've really connected in a way we hadn't before. She's really wonderful and I have grown to respect her more and more as she has taken the reins of her life and begun to make conscious choices everyday.



(doesn't she look amazing in pink?) She came over Wednesday night and I made her that awesome bracelet ^ -- it's the most meaningful jewelry I've ever made, and what a fantastic idea! *pats self on back* She chose each bead to represent a pain in her life, a wound that needs acknowledgement and healing, and I strung them on wire and linked them together. As she grows and heals from each wounding, we will replace each black bead with a colorful one representing the good that she gained from the experience. She posted about it here if you're curious. (the ribbon is part of the bracelet btw) I am thinking of hunting down some violet ribbon and making myself a meaningful bracelet, not the same meaning but very symbolic...

And Hannah, oh my wonderful girl, well, we had a conflict earlier from a misunderstanding that hurt me, and she was so patient with my fear (I was terrified that she would be angry at me or reject me for feeling the way I felt), just kept on and on pursuing and didn't give up until I eventually got the courage to tell her what it was, and then we talked it out and she was so understanding and apologetic (though she didn't actually do anything wrong) and now I am suffused with hannah-love. ♥ She's truly... shimmering. beautiful glorious shimmering girl ♥

...and I'm still feeling uplifted from Angelina's dream-visit. ♥ ♥ ♥


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on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.