July 2017
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belversion of the interview meme: answer 7 -- personal beauty 'standards'


(from this meme)

7. (from blood_4_deniro) I know you don't subscribe to society's rigid beauty standards they have on women. but I know that most people have certain characteristics they find attractive, most of us also have preferences for certain types of looks. so... I was wondering do you have your own set of beauty standards for men and/or women?

Well this is a complicated question, and I love it! I don't consider myself to have a standard, but some would say I do, because I find all different looks equally attractive, but certain ones catch my eye more. My belief on beauty is that it is found in variety, and each person is their own ideal. I'm attracted to EVERYTHING (with one exception -- bulky muscular white men. It's connected to a trigger, and I'll leave it at that). On men, I like sharp-featured, craggy-faced, bleached blonde, dark, redheaded... On women, I like wide or narrow hips, large or small breasts, round-bellied, flat-bellied... On either, pierced, tattooed, plain, long hair, short hair, curly or straight hair, shaved head, tall, short, slender, thick, pale, dark... any combination of anything is attractive to me. But I do prefer people who look especially unique. I like figures with contrasts (called 'disproportionate' by the unenlightened), like small busts and wide hips or vice versa. I like any unusual features. And there are certain features I am initially drawn to most. On a man, slim but muscular, tall, dark skin, long dark hair, facial hair but no mustache. (essentially, my partner) On a woman, shaved head or short dark hair, full breasts, wide hips, rounded belly, thick thighs, and muscular calves (and not body-shaved!). But the thing is, those aren't my ideal because if you showed me a woman that fit that description exactly, I would still find others to be just as attractive. There's this artist on dA with very narrow hips, a slim belly, slender legs, small breasts, and shaved parts, and I think she's just as gorgeous. She just wouldn't catch my attention as fast if I walked by both women in a store. The features that catch my eye the quickest are: on a woman: wide sensual hips, on a man: slender gracefulness, in faces: green or blue hazel eyes, very thick or arching eyebrows, full lips, and dark hair. The only things I find unattractive are fake tans, heavy boring makeup ('goth' or 'actress' type), non-expressive or body-hiding clothing, a way of moving/facial expression that betrays a lack of interest in life, or muscles that obviously take more than 3 hours a week to maintain (especially ab muscles -- don't like washboards on either sex).

Also, I think that the internal self shines through, and I think that that is the thing that attracts me most. Sometimes a person will catch my eye, and I'll watch them for a second and lose interest because I either can't get a feel for their inner self, or I don't like the feel I get. Other times a person will catch my eye and I will be absolutely enamored to the point of wanting to follow them around, and they don't have any of the features that usually draw me. And once in a good while someone will catch my eye with a feature and keep it with their inner self, like my partner. ;-)

*note: my aesthetic attraction has nothing to do with my sexual/romantic attraction. possible post on that at a later date...

and now I turn the question on my flist: do you have your own set of beauty standards for men/women? if so, what are they?


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on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.