November 2017
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music sharing: Beauty's Confusion, Daughter Darling, Neulander, Orenda Fink


22 of my five-star favorite songs on the 22nd of each month ;-) A five-star song is one that has strong melodic pull as well as significant lyrical meaning to me (if there are lyrics) -- all of these are very important to me. In sharing them I'm sharing some of my soul... I'm trusting you to listen and sense it. ♥

In this post: Beauty's Confusion, Daughter Darling, Neulander, and Orenda Fink. All of these artists put out only one album before breaking up to form new projects (except possibly Neulander? but I can't find news of anything new). I believe all of these were introduced to me by alwaysontherun.net -- an awesome site by someone who has similar tastes and a lot more time spent researching ;-) Beauty's Confusion's "Breathe In" has lovely rhythms and a really unique sound -- a mixture of rock and trip-hop. It's a little dark, so I don't listen to it to it that often, but when I do I really enjoy it. Daughter Darling's "Sweet Shadows" has a really sexy, thick drama, and it's also dark but with a little winding thread of silver hope. It has a fierceness to it that I love intensely -- and Natalie Walker's voice is exactly in my range, which means I can sing along. The sound is very evocative, and each song is amazingly thematic. The song Mermaid is practically holographic. Neulander's "Smoke & Fire" has a funky, crazy edge half the time, and the other half of the time is coastingly thoughtful. The lyrics enchant me with their mix of insane poetry and commentary on life and society. Orenda Fink's "Invisible Ones" is INCREDIBLE. Orenda is from the south, and I can feel that in zir music -- not only in zir obvious lyrics such as "Dirty South" (I LOVE IT), but in the songs that are more open to interpretation, like "Animal" -- they reflect the same spirit of the land here that I feel. I would like to meet Orenda. ♥



Belenen's favorites -- January 2009 mix
(click pic to download a zip of all songs)




(click titles to download individual songs)




Beauty's Confusion
(all from Breathe In)


Silhouette
Giving up and giving in
Is there any other way
Losing hope, losing you
I'll lose it all someday

I can't explain it to you
My heart is open like a book
Why won't you take a look

I feel like a fool
A shadow in the midst
Which you won't even miss

I don't want to try anymore to be seen
I'm invisible anyway
I'm nobody's dream
You're the last one who will kiss me
I can't forget
I've disappeared into the distance
I've become a silhouette


-

Whirlwind
They're coming around
The words you've sent
No changing your mind
It's your only regret
To live is to face your darkest fears
Running away is what keeps you here

It's because of your lies I begin
To find my way
Only now do I see in the distance
Denial highway

When I'm away
You'll be lost in a whirlwind
hate all the problems you create
Can't you see it's just dead weight

You've wasted away
The time you've spent
Judging with jealous eyes
You can't forget
You welcome the pain
And live with fear
As dreams begin to blur
Stagnance appears


-

Faded
I'm waiting for you under blue christmas lights
Trimmed the wick and lit the candle, scent you've always liked
Seems like i watch the clock each hour
Only two minutes pass

So I wait
Wait
Wait
For the next time

I've been thinking so much about
Our last conversation
Even though I sounded mad
You've always brought me elation
I never meant to stale the air
To cloud our communication
Something about the tone of your voice
Left my heart an abrasion

So I wait for you
So I wait for you
So I'll wait forever


-

Moments Like These
One day
I went too far
Swam in shark-finned waters
In their net I was caught
They stared at me so cold
Their lives without meaning
Their minds never grow

You'd say I ran away
While you stayed to play
With facades in shallow graves
This is not my scene
It's your thing
To be the life of every moment
While I live inside my dreams

Moments like these
Revealing the true me
Moments like these
Seeing so clearly

I hide with the ghosts
Playing in the darkness
It's what i love the most
I am all alone
Enjoying the silence
Enjoying my home


-

Innocence Destructing
How do I have faith?
I try, I try to trust you
But you never follow through
Before I turn myself away
For you


I am not
This isolated
I am not
This shy or strange or jaded

I am innocence destructing
Turn on you to force the change
Turn myself into the victim
Of my own creation

I am disconnection central
Lost the party on my line
Too much longing in this distance
For a new form of communication


I am not
This self-defeating
It's just
A phrase I keep repeating


-




Daughter Darling
(all from Sweet Shadows)


Broken Bridge
How could you walk across that broken bridge
All their eyes followed as you so gracefully lived

Falling through your sphere
All I know is you and here
Your tongue is fire when you speak
But you make me sing

Your love makes me sing

All my spaces are filled with you
With all the colors in the world yours had to be blue

And I'm breaking through your shameless ways
I can't refrain


-

Let Me Speak
Take one long at my face and then my eyes
Look deeper now
And you'll see all your lies inside

'Cause I can't take the abuse
Of a fairytale I never knew
My heart will hang you from your toes
Once your lover now your foe
I was your lover now I'm your foe

I'm gonna talk
Now let me talk
I'm gonna speak my mind
A sight so new
Your tears fall through
I'd be crying too if I was you
Let me make this short
I'm gonna make this sweet
While I walk out your door

I'm gonna leave because you won't
This love to you has been a joke
I'm out of touch, my heart is broke
I've found with you there's no hope


-

Mermaid
I swim into the bottom of your world
For every space I cross I see a thousand pearls

I breathe what I know you fear
All the sounds I love, you will never hear
I know what it is that turns beneath your feet
Floating on the surface of my enchanted sea

Close your eyes and take my hand
Hold your breath as long as you can
We'll leave behind the storms above
And swim into the seas of our love


-

Sad & Lonely
Did they tell you I was boring
Do you know where to order the next morning
There is no guarantee, no guarantee
That when you wake up
You'll be able to breathe

So I'll throw you moonbeams
I'll make you
Kick and scream
Oh then baby I'll
I'll make you smile
Then I'll make you bleed

Did you forget your place of ambition
I've seemed to move you from your only position
Your position
You're so afraid of my reality
'Cause it burned your eyes
Makes you sad and lonely


-

You Won't See Me
All the worlds that I turn towards
Won't look me in the eye
Somethings hiding from the truth that ever was
And slipping into a lie

I won't be the one to stay
I'll run into a brand new day
And I'll leave before the sky is grey
And you won't see me no you won't see me again

Keep hiding your shameful face
Blushed in the guilt of what you did
Know I will put you in your place
This lie I refuse to live

And I'll become so brave
I'll walk into a brand new day
And I'll leave before your sky is grey
No you won't see me oh you won't see me again
No suffering no you wont see me again


-

Dust in the Wind
I close my eyes
Only for a moment
And the moment's gone
All my dreams
Pass before my eyes a curiosity
Dust in the wind
All they are is dust in the wind

Same old song
Just a drop of water
In an endless sea
All we do
Crumbles to the ground
Though we refuse to see
Dust in the wind
All we are is dust in the wind

Now, don't hang on
Nothing lasts forever
But the earth and sky
,
It slips away
And all your money
Won't another minute buy


-




Neulander
(from Smoke & Fire)


Sex, God + Money
it's a trancendental emergency
the finger just seemed to land on me
tulips stare at the painted sky
love or perish on the grapevine
said a wise person from another time

around I go for another day
it usually happens pretty much the same way;
I think about sex, I think about God, I'm thinking about money
I think about sex, I think about God, I'm thinking about money

it's a beautiful day for skipping rocks,
all the little insects are making love
diamonds are floating up in the sky,
throwing down answers at the midnight dances


-

Girl Out Walking
Girl out walking, moons in the blue,
making another stand.
Girl out walking,
swinging arms jingle by
quickly followed by a fly.
Girl out walking,
short ones turn to look back.

Look I stretch my arms a thousand times,
one more time,
I stretch my arms a thousand times,
I stretch my arms a thousand times.
And here, it disappears!

Girl out walking, not too much
wants to look ahead so many times.
New tunes disappear,
hiding behind the same old fears.
Lift this beauty,
caught some distance
did not catch it all at once.

not asking to be looked at by me or by you,
not asking to be looked at by me or by you.


-

Flying
She was a lonely girl,
doesn't have a lot of something to remind you.
Lives in a lonely world,
she's always been there
riding right behind you.

She travelled around the world,
going about it all the wrong way.
She travelled on until something comes up,
but you know it never will.

She was a lonely girl,
grew up in her own society.
You took a little piece of her,
like you took a little piece of you and me.

She travelled around the world,
in order to get away from her mother,
and well it was strange because,
one thing never really led to another,
and...

If you see her you should remind her of all the things she said,
if you see her you should see remind she's better off cause she's
not dead.
...not dead.

I've lived in golden cities,
and I've lived in funeral towns.
Went to the roof of the world,
and I didn't ever want to come
...down.

My mother is dead and my father is dead and all my brothers and sisters are dead
and my heart
...goes boom-boom-boom.
...my heart goes boom-boom-boom.
...my heart goes boom-boom-boom.


-

Middle East
it's coming up from the ground
growing to a different sound
we've got water running through our veins
helps to get past all the bad things

a little boat shipped across the sand
a hot wind blows over the land
a hundred and ten in the desert blooms
and the rain starts falling as nighttime looms

well we seem to be going in different directions
we stop for a while to make corrections

step into the shade under long tan palms
out of reach from the one with the giant arms

and the shimmering sun makes you see
what you're gonna see
on this dune you are already what
you want to be


-

Schauspieler
no English
(schauspieler means actor)


-

People's Love
Dipping toes into the blue
Upside down, looking for you
I know you exist, but you love hiding
For the longest time
I felt myself sliding
You can tell not everybody knows
When love hits, there is no more pretend


I just wanted to say
I was so wrong in so many different ways
Now I've past what I could not see
Nothing matters and maybe I'll be free

Strange to give a name to what I really feel
Inside out, looking for you


-




Orenda Fink
(from Invisible Ones)


Les Invisibles
I make it each day
With the help of the good Lord
But late night
I comb the streets
Looking for a way to feed

Hell came in the way
Of a war and a child
That never returned
He never returned

We raise our hands and pray
Les invisibles
We hold our heads in shame
Les invisibles

And as my weathered hands
Cracked and colored
With years of pain
Of the brokenhearted
Frame their plates
Of whiten and gold
You take no note
Of your warm presenter
Would you like to know what
I'd done for dinner
And I've outlived my boy

Just to serve it to you
You've waged this war
The rich wage wars
The rich take more


-

Dirty South
In a flatbed, in a trailer
You are royalty there
Among keys and their jailers
You speak the truth with open mouth
Oh to be a boy
In the dirty south

The trees standing
While they sharpen their blades
To cut you down

Beautiful things can come from
The dark, I once said and I
Hoped that you would believe and
Rise up from the ashes
but now
You've been beaten down
By the dirty south

So let's give a crown
A gold shining crown
To the dirty south


-

Invisible Ones Guard the Gate
He said, "One, two, three, four,
There ain't no devil, there ain't no Lord.
Five, six, seven, eight,
Only love, only hate."

I went to a preacher to seek the truth
The wisest man that I knew
The preacher had fallen, his colar torn
He slept with a bottle, his face unshorn
He looked at me with bloodshot eyes
A beaten man can tell no lies

He said, "Prophets, pimps, angels, whores,
There ain't no devil, there ain't no Lord.
Money grows to fill the preacher's bank
He saves your soul for himself to take."

I travelled the world to understand
The words he spoke were no man's
I came to an island of beauty and pain
Shimmering souls, untamed
And now the children, talking bright
Sing to me in the night


They sing, "One, two, three, four,
There ain't no devil, there ain't no Lord.
Five, six, seven, eight,
Invisible ones guard the gate.
Invisible ones guard the gate."


-

Animal
Where are the ones who lived before?
They are the cold winds in the north
Where are the ones who teach us how?
In sweet magnolias in the south
How do you hear the elders speak?
In the rains across the east
And what about the spirits’ breath?
Their sigh, a dust storm in the west

Who are you?
I am an animal

Who are you?
I am a man with will

Where are you?
I came from the hill

Where are the ones who lived before?
Where are the ones who teach us how?
How do you hear the elders speak?
And what about the spirits’ breath?

Who are you?
I am the invisible


-

No Evolution
It was the year of the flood
It was the hand of God
The strength of a monsoon
A revolution

I put my hand in the cup
Drew my name from the mud
I had changed it once before
But that didn't change things

I put my face to the glass
But it's you that stares back
I had changed it once before
But that didn't change things

The year of the drought
It was the hand of God
The absence of water
Made us fearful

After all I could find
Were the wells of my mind
I had changed it once before
But that didn't change things

No, no evolution
No, no evolution

I know there's a circle
Of death and birth
But I won't wait and lose you
To this big black earth
I said

No, no evolution
No, no evolution

I put my hand on your face
With no words to replace
The ones that say that
We must leave each other one day
I said...

No, no evolution
No, no evolution
No, no evolution
No, no evolution


-



ETA: I forgot to include the poll so could you please comment to let me know if you're downloading or listening to the playlist?

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Comments
ladywind ══╣╠══
Your music posts are always so interesting. :) <3 the combination of electronic beats and water-clear voices.
belenen ══╣effervescent╠══
:D
phoenixdreaming ══╣╠══
Downloading right now!

By the way, did you see? I received your gift! Thank you so much <3 And it turned out to be a perfect evening to pick it up from the delivery office, too; calm and dry and mild, when it's been cold and wet and windy recently. There's about a twenty minute walk from there to my house, past a large park and elegant aging houses, and it was so very pleasant.
belenen ══╣curious╠══
yay! what did you think of the music? any keepers?

♥!
shioneh ══╣flowing╠══
♥ thank you :-)

I downloaded, haven't listened to them all yet but so far love Neulander.
belenen ══╣curious╠══
oh cool! If you've since listened to them all, what do you like?
delicatexflower ══╣esotsm; clem - happy. "comfort"╠══

lovely music!! thanks for sharing. i love it when you share your music with us!! :D
belenen ══╣curious╠══
you're so welcome! :D what did you like best?
sidheblessed ══╣╠══
I downloaded your mix, I'll let you know what I think of each when I've listen to it for a bit.
belenen ══╣effervescent╠══
oh, yay! I look forward to it! ;-)
darkpool ══╣╠══
I downloaded it.
belenen ══╣curious╠══
cool, have you listened yet? if so, what do you think?
darkpool ══╣╠══
I liked, I actually listened to much of it before I downloaded it. Now I have to figure out how to get it on my iphone.
suesniffsglue ══╣╠══
This is such a wonderful gift..it's so nice of you to take the time to share like this. This is exactly what I needed tonight. I downloaded it all and found Daughter Darling and Orenda Fink to be my favorites :)
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.