November 2017
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I have local community for the first time in my life / speaking things into existence w affirmations


I am so deeply grateful to have found people who live nearby whom I connect with and who are honest and open and loving and complex ♥ This is something I've yearned for for so many years and I can't even express the intensity of my gratitude for each person. Ash & Viv & Ben & Shel & Saleena & Nicole and and and... I mean, most of the friendships are still in beginning stages but there's already that sense of belonging -- the only time I've ever felt anything like this before was when I was living with the Wynnes and they made me part of the family, and even that wasn't this amazing. It feels like home. It makes me feel safe without feeling bound. It makes me free to be more fully myself.

I just looked back through my LJ to see the timeline on this... I first wrote about my longing for a like-minded community almost exactly a year ago. Then last January I started saying an affirmation which included the line, "I attract miraculous happenings and open, honest, connected, loving equalist people. I find new friends everywhere I go; I make deep connections with people who live near me." By mid-May I'd met all of my localtribe (though I didn't know then that I'd form such a strong bond with them). In that same affirmation I included the line, "I develop intimate relationships with polyamorous, feminist, genderfree violet spirits" (because why limit it to one, haha) and by mid-June I'd met Viv ♥ (annoyingly I didn't specify "living nearby and STAYING NEARBY." oh universe, you with your sadistic sense of humor :-p) There's other bits which have also come to pass -- I think in a way I spelled out the end of my relationship with my ex-partner AND my ex-girlfriend with the line, "I know which relationships to focus on developing." Apparently I didn't, so it became PAINFULLY obvious by them essentially dumping me. (still grateful for that though) I haven't been saying it since June but now that I'm looking over it I think I will start using it again with some minor changes.

And you know, I first started 'affirming' a local group of friends in March of 2008, but shortly after I began using that affirmation I fell in love with Hannah and Aurilion and stopped saying the affirmation because I felt that I had all the wonder I could handle. And then it seems I forgot about it or lost faith in it and didn't start again until the beginning of 2009, when I decided what the hell, it couldn't hurt. I want to remind myself that this fucking WORKS. I don't care how -- if it's just that it helps me to focus and pay attention more and discover what would have been there anyway, that's magic enough for me. But I believe that gratitude mixed with intention and focus opens up possibility that would not have otherwise existed. Especially since Ash has been affirming unlikely things and having them happen -- it's just as amazing to see it happen in someone else's life.

Words are so powerful. What I say, I hear. What I hear over and over, I believe. What I believe, I live.

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Comments
vivere_et_amare ══╣╠══
Those are beautiful affirmations.
acid_burns ══╣╠══
"Words are so powerful. What I say, I hear. What I hear over and over, I believe. What I believe, I live."

aerialmelodies ══╣Happy Hugs╠══
Keep saying those affirmations! We draw what we want to us, and you're doing just that. <3
delicatexflower ══╣hope. girl. "flowers batch in hand"╠══

ah. i love that last line so much! * i believe words have feelings. they have more meaning then some people realize. i have no doubt. your words are so powerful. keep your words coming. i want to hear more! ♥
smurfb1ue ══╣something more than ordinary╠══
What you said at the end rings so true to me. We do live only what we truly believe, and we can't believe something until we internalize, process, and take ownership of it.
butafli ══╣╠══
The true meaning of Magic!
Smooches chica!
theindiequeen ══╣╠══
I'm so glad that everything is going so well for you! You seem very happy and...I don't know...I kind of want to say "beaming." That feels like a good word.

Amen on the affirmations! When I actually remember to focus on my positive affirmations, they really do work! I have trouble with getting stuck in negativity, though, and sometimes it's hard for me to get myself out of it. Lately, though, I've been finding it's helpful to acknowledge the negative thoughts and then rebuke them with positive ones as opposed to just pretending I don't have negative thoughts at all.

Didn't you at some point say that you wanted to start a spirituality discussion, meet-up, and/or book group? I've been thinking that some sort of "community" of like-minded people would be really good lately, but I don't really know that many local people who would be interested.
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.