July 2017
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the movie 'Life or Something Like It'


I just watched "Life or Something Like It." Bleh.

It would have been a decent, B+ movie except for two things:
1) Angelina Jolie's hair is short, fluffy and blond.
2) The male costar CANNOT act.

Unfortunately, those two things made it nearly impossible for me to concentrate on the plot or anything else about the movie. I mean, WHAT THE HELL???? Jolie's hair should NEVER, EVER be fluffy! That's like putting lipstick on a mountain lion -- it looks unbelievably stupid. The only times she looks anything like herself is when she's supposed to be looking awful -- ie. when she's smashed, when she just wakes up, and when she's wearing those supposedly "dorky" glasses (that actually look very attractive with her jawline). It's like the costume director was obsessed with the movie "Never Been Kissed" and tried to make this movie look like it.

And Ed Burns? I'm not sure how he got cast in ANYTHING.... or rather, I don't want to know what he did to get the part. A cutout would have played his role better. Then again, he was playing a rather flat character to begin with, so maybe it's not all his fault.


Oh, yeah, and there was one bit of dialogue that rescued the movie from complete mediocrity:

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"'Curiously Strong'... that's kinda like her, isn't it?"

"Y'gonna give me an Altoids metaphor now?"

"No-no-no, now listen. 'Cause uh, first you can only take her in small doses, right? Then after a while, you start to like the burn, y'know? You acquire a little taste for it, y'know? But it scares you, 'cause you're afraid one day the drugstore's gonna be flat out of Altoids, and then what? So you pick up some cinnamon gum or some uh, spearmint tic-tacs, but guess what? Nothing else is gonna cut it for you anymore, cowboy."
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feelings: hot
connecting:


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on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.