September 2017
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Serendipity family / Chip & tarot / talking with Christa / spirit connection with Anita! / chakras


Last Thursday evening I invited myself over to Anita's and ended up staying until laaaate Friday night. (it all kinda blurs together now so this is gonna be pretty stream-of-consciousness) I can't even express how wonderful it was to spend time with zir and zir family! They all have this very accepting and flexible attitude -- they don't feel like the kind of unit that defines itself by what it is not. Which is pretty rare, I think. I haven't felt so welcome by a family since I lived with the Wynnes. Being welcomed by a group of individuals is different -- it's like the difference between a bunch of hugs from different people and a group hug. And everyone is just so warm and kind and willing to connect, which is something I've NEVER experienced from a family before. And they share that sort of respect and understanding with their children that means the children follow direction without resentment -- WONDERFUL. (I'd started dreading being around children because without that, the children are either rotten tyrants that I wanna smack or cowering subjects whose parents I wanna smack) And last time I came over I was wearing my free hugs button and both P and R shared lots of hugs with me which was sooo sweet. I really really like everybody in the family.

At one point Chip did a tarot reading on me, sorta -- on how I'd affect the family. It was really interesting and spoke to me pretty clearly of how my life has lead me to this very point and even though everything is so freaking INSANE, it's on the right track. I didn't really understand how it pertained to the family (except for Anita) but I was impressed with the meaning that I took from it and I kinda want to get Chip to do another reading for me but I don't know if I actually want to know answers (that's always my quandary with divination). :-p

Christa took me to lunch on Friday and we talked about all sorts of things -- mainly about zir history and my plans (if they can be called that, heh) for the immediate future. It kinda amazes me just how at ease I am with zir. Usually I hate talking to people about what is essentially my failure to be independent (so far), but ze's just so completely nonjudgmental that I actually felt comfortable. We drove around and picked up the kids and then all went to dinner (somewhere with vegetarian options, just for me :-O).

and oh yeah, I spent time with Anita! We went swimming, sorta -- it was very cold so we mainly eased our way in, clung to each other for warmth, and then dashed up to the hot tub. And of course we talked and cuddled and kissed and I got dreamy-drunk on zir presence. Some point during the night (after we actually got to sleep) I woke up and sensed/saw zir spirit! It's this incredible bright lavender, which I completely didn't expect. (it's not a flat shade of course -- it looks a lot like this) And that answered my question on how we connect, through spirit! (though there may be other ways too that I don't yet know.) I've only ever seen spirit colors when having sex with someone before so it was awe-inspiring to see it without even touching at the time. And now I understand why I was so intimidated by the idea of exploring connection with Anita. Wow. If it weren't for the fact that I don't like losing intimacy, I'd want to break up with people all the time because it seems to give me such a push to do important things that I've been too scared of.

Then Saturday! Anita came over and we went to my coffeehouse (the green couch was taken, sadly) and one of the long-time baristas told me that I looked MARVELOUS and wondered why. I looked at Anita and giggled and wanted to be like, "ze is why" *points to Anita* but I was too flustered, hee. We had coffee and conversation and then went back to my flat and listened to Au Revoir Simone because I couldn't start off with Noe Venable for fear that Anita wouldn't like zir and then I wouldn't want to share any more music. But ze liked Au Revoir Simone so maybe next time I'll introduce zir to Azure Ray and Heather Nova and Missy Higgins and THEN if ze likes those three, Noe ;-) Not all at once of course.

Monday after borderpagans Chip and I had a really interesting conversation about ethereal connections -- ze doesn't sense them in a visual sort of way but in a kinesthetic way, which I'd never heard anyone describe before. I talked a little bit about the five parts of a person, as I see them, and ze spoke of chakras, and in the discussion that followed I had a clicking-into-place moment where I finally figured out a way to describe how I see the chakras interacting with the ethereal self. It's as if the five parts of a person are layered one over the other, and the chakras are bars that stretch through the ethereal and physical self and affect a person. And a person can connect through each chakra on every level -- body, mind, soul, heart, and spirit. Which expanded my understanding of ways one can connect! ♥


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tralfamadore ══╣╠══
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.