November 2017
      1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29 30


not friends with S and Ash right now


I mentioned that S was mad at me. Well, ze still is, and Ash is angry at me too. I really don't know why Ash is angry at me because ze hasn't really communicated with me. At this point I've tried all I know to do with S and I know from scarred experience that trying to work it out with Ash just doesn't work when Ash is angry, so I suppose we're not friends for now. And I think in the future if we're friends again we're going to have to come to some sort of compromise over how to handle conflict because I find Ash's style really upsetting and ze finds mine upsetting but instead of using something in-between it's just been running on Ash's style. Things have been painfully stressful for the past month or so and I'm pretty exhausted over the whole situation, so I'm attempting to put it out of my mind. I imagine that we'll be friends again in the future but I'm not eager for that any time soon.

back to top

Comments
sidheblessed ══╣╠══
*hugs*
belenen ══╣comfort╠══
thanks lovey *hugs back*
moonvoice ══╣vilturj - shaman - vasilia's skull╠══
You have to do what's best for you, and I'm sorry that things have been so stressful. It's horrible when great friendships have big hiccups like this, especially when you can't really communicate with the people involved.

*hugs if you want them* I'm sorry.
jenniology ══╣Hold me╠══
*more hugs*
shioneh ══╣trust╠══
*gentle empathic hug* I'm really sorry that this happened, I can really imagine how draining that must have been/must be, especially at a time with some much other change for you, so I'm hoping you have the space and time to recover.
xochitl ══╣╠══
A had a friend get angry at me and refuse to communicate to me about it... 2 years later she still hates me and I still don't know what I did. It's amazing that she has the energy to still be mad.
delicatexflower ══╣╠══

it's one thing to be upset about how someone handled a certain situation, but it's also just as important how you decide to handle it. whenever i'm upset with someone, i voice my feelings but i always listen to hear where they were coming from, too! ash sounds a bit stubborn (sorry if that comes off as bitchy, i promise it's not meant as that..) -- it's not about taking sides, it's about understanding both point of views and if you like, help find a happy medium to both of your friends! :( i'm sorry this is happening... so draining in deed! *hugs warmly*
aerialmelodies ══╣Supportive╠══
Many hugs, love. Focus on the positives in your life! <3

I think in the future if we're friends again we're going to have to come to some sort of compromise over how to handle conflict because I find Ash's style really upsetting and ze finds mine upsetting

My mom was saying the same thing last night about people. Different people handle things in different ways, but it's up to two people to figure out a compromise to find an answer. Interestingly, she said she felt neither method was wrong (avoiding conflict or - in a sense - actively creating it) but that how it is handled later is what truly matters in the end (which again can vary depending on the people involved). Hope it resolves itself for you soon. *hugs*
frecklestars ══╣heart-print╠══
I hope it gets better in the future (hopefully sooner rather than later). *hughughug*
kmiotutsie ══╣╠══
:-/
amatese ══╣╠══
you know why im mad
you judged me very harshly back in January when we were discussing some things that i had been involved in and you hurt me deeply and every time you tried to talk to me you kept making excuses and trying to change your opinion. especially after i confronted you about it and then all of a sudden you felt a connection to someone who was or is involved in the same thing you judged me so harshly upon. so what im saying is i cant be friends with someone who judges me and my actions but can accept someone else's because of a connection.i feel betrayed, hurt, and like you were being two faced. on top of everything else i went to help Ashley pack up her stuff and guess what i found yes the vest you specifically asked me for after i bought it for myself and it was tossed in the middle of the floor with the trash not to mention that you left everything else that i had given to you as a gift behind for trash im sorry in my opinion friends cherish gifts given from the heart not throw it away with the trash. so my point is i dont feel like we were ever friends and never will be you were two faced and a back stabber i dont want some one in my life who thinks they can throw me out with the trash. so next time you decid to be judgmental think about your actions and what a good reaction should be. you know i think the old saying is true who needs enemies with "friends" like you. oh and please keep my name out of further post i am not someone who appreciates that especially since you dont know the first or last thing about me.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
Re: you know why im mad
I understand and am sorry that you felt judged, but I've explained my actual feelings and apologized for making a stupid comment that did not at all express how I felt. I could explain all over again but that would be pointless, as my true feelings sound like excuses to you.

The one thing I do want to say is that I did not mean to leave the vest behind. I very much valued it and was very touched by the sacrifice you made in giving it to me. I left in a hurry -- that is not the only important thing that I meant to take that I left behind.

I know that you think very little of me and that there is nothing I can do about that. I will take your name down.
belenen ══╣analytical╠══
Re: you know why im mad
you wanted to know why I froze these comments, so here's why.

I wanted to work it out with you and tried my best to understand and empathize and apologize. Perhaps I failed miserably. Whatever the case, I think it's pretty clear that you do not like me and do not have any respect for me, so there doesn't seem to me to be anything else I can do. At this point, I'm tired of being called a two-faced backstabbing bitch and I would like it if you would stop telling me just how worthless I am. I already know that you feel that way about me and it isn't making anything better to keep going back and forth in the same way.
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.