July 2017
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more memory-bank posting: meeting Koronah, time w Anita & Kyle & Chip & Christa & Ben / visiting Ace


22nd -- I write all morning and then go out with Kyle in the evening. We meet up with zir-friend-who-has-no-name-who-goes-by-Coyote but whom I will call Koronah, and Kyle plays violin for Koronah's child Elijah (awe-inspiring interaction <3). We talk about things-that-are-awake and intuition-adventure our way to the places we go. We stop by Java Lords and Kyle takes photos of random strangers, asking them to imagine stories. I'm still feeling very off-center about the conversation Kyle and I had about monogamy (because I'm worried that Kyle will end things with me to be monogamous with someone ze wants more) so nearing the end of the evening we talk about it and Koronah listens and sort of holds sacred space for us. Afterward I feel deeply connected with Kyle in a way I don't even have words for and interacting with Koronah makes me so aware of the sacredness of all things and gives me more confidence in expressing that. Kyle stays the night and we spend most of it talking and kissing.

23rd -- I meet up with Kyle and Koronah again after getting lost in the city for ages trying to get to the same place they are. They talk and I watch their interaction and marvel at their connection and feel honored to touch their circle. We've left my car in an alley with signs posted saying "park here and you'll get towed" and when I come back to my car there is a note on it warning me that my car will be towed if I don't move it by morning. I am overwhelmed with wonder/joy that some person decided to show me kindness instead of just punishing me (which would have been quite fair, as I couldn't possibly have been ignorant of the illegality of parking there). At the end of the evening Kyle stays the night and we have blocks of actual sleep between talking.

24th -- I take Kyle back to Koronah's hotel and before ze leaves I talk with zir about what Atlanta means to me and share Noe Venable's "Black Madonna" with zir and ze feels it which overwhelms me with joy and that-emotion-that-isn't-quite-relief. I go job-hunting for a little while and then head to Serendipity to go out with Anita. We have an amazingly beautiful night complete with swimming and dunking fights and hot tubbing with Chip and Christa and amazing sex.

25th -- I meet up with Kyle to take photos of zir pregnant friend Sarah (funnnn practice!) and then we go to Serendipity. Kyle and Christa spend time together and Anita & Chip & I spend time together (also giggly spying on them while they're sitting on the porch :D) Chip does another tarot reading on the connection between the three of us and Anita drifts to sleep and Chip draws a series of questions for me (I'm trying to figure out the direction for my life right now, worrying about having to move back in with my biofamily) which all turn out muddy and then I end up pouring out all my fears about money and family and my general helplessness/ uselessness. As I get to the end of it I ask Chip to pour energy through my chakras and ze does, and Anita wakes up and the three of us have amazing sex until Chip has to go to zir massage appointment.

26th -- Anita and I go to sleep and a while later Kyle joins us and then Chip and Christa get back and also join, so we're lined up in the bed Chip-Anita-me-Kyle-Christa and then we all roll over and Chip goes to the other side of the bed, and then again we roll and Anita goes to the other side, and then again and I go to the other side and there is so much happiness and cuddles and kisses and sexy things and if I woke up like that every day I'd love mornings. Eventually we get out of bed and go out to lunch with Kim and Carol and Jerry and the children. Then we come back and I talk with Kyle for a bit while planning on talking to Anita at 5pm -- watching the clock to make sure I have enough time. Later I found out that G (the toddler) called out, "Bel, it's 5 o'clock!" when the computer announced the time -- there is no way ze could have found out that I was planning that because I wasn't anywhere around, but ze had picked up on my intent (this is not the first time I've been awed at the awareness/intuition of this child!) I talk with Anita for a while and then talk with Chip also and then Kyle calls, worried, and I go to talk with zir for a while too. Finally I head home and spend lovely connected time with Ben before falling asleep.

27th -- Ben and I get up and go to breakfast with M, and I'm relieved that they manage to make conversation. My life revolves around two things right now -- money worries and poly delights -- one of which I'm sick of talking about and the other of which M doesn't want to hear about. So after breakfast, M drives us to New Orleans without much conversation. When we drive into the city I suddenly understand why everyone seemed afraid that I'd stay in NO, because this city smiles at me much like Atlanta does. P and M and Ace and I go to dinner which is very yummy but somewhat tainted by the exhausted arguments and LOUD tension between P and M. When we get back Ace and I play a game of Yahtzee with M (who then goes to bed) and then spend lots of time talking and laughing and blowing raspberries on each other and just generally being ridiculously awesome :D AND Ace gives me a foot massage which is sorta the best thing in the universe, and paints my toenails which makes my feet look alien and too grown-up to me. Kyle calls and we talk for a good while and then Ace and I talk more.

28th -- Ace and I wake up late and hang around until P and M get off work. I have a short conversation with Anita and Chip and then P and M arrive. P is annoyed that Ace and I weren't ready to go (I wasn't aware we had plans to go out) and M is annoyed at life and P and M are annoyed with each other and there is so much crankiness. Finally P takes Ace and I out to rent a movie and get pizza, then drops us off and goes home. M has already eaten by the time we get back and stays in zir room until P leaves, when ze comes out for a minute and then goes back in. A little while later I go to see if ze wants to play a game but the door is shut and the light off so I just leave it. Ace and I sing together and talk while ze plays around online and I edit photos from the last time I saw zir (at Christmas). Then I write and ze talks with the person ze's crushing on.


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on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.