October 2017
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30 31


dirt-level basics on how to be respectful of people who are different from you: a list of 3 don'ts


1) Don't make jokes about their difference from you. This means, if they have a different skin tone, don't make jokes about it. If they have a different gender identity, don't make jokes about it. (this includes "jokingly" or "affectionately" using slurs that refer to a group you're not in) If they have a different relationship style, don't make jokes about it. There are many reasons for this, but the very most basic is that it feels like you're saying "you're not one of us, isn't that funny?"
2) Don't make general statements about how "those people" who are different from you behave, look, think, etc. If you are not one of that group, you're probably just repeating stereotypes, so just don't make general statements. NO, knowing someone from that group -- even very very well -- DOES NOT change this. If you're quoting someone else's opinion on group A, make sure that person is a member of group A and make sure you state it as a quote of a specific person, not as a general fact.
3) Don't make assumptions, and don't put the burden of your ignorance on other people. If you don't know, educate yourself through the internet and the library/bookstore. Feel free to ask for resources, but don't demand free tutoring. You can ask IF the person WANTS to be extremely generous and give you free tutoring, but there is a reason we pay teachers, professors, and tutors -- it's WORK teaching someone, highly skilled and frustrating work.

back to top

Comments
tangledaxon ══╣╠══
I love this.
anrui_ichido ══╣╠══
ukta ══╣╠══
I personally don't think it's okay even if the person making a comment about a certain group is part of that certain group. It's almost always a generalization or stereotype. I typically point out that they're perpetuating stereotypes no matter who the speaker is.
belenen ══╣artless╠══
yeah, I agree. I wanted to keep this as simple as possible so I didn't go into those things.
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.