July 2018
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wow... she listened, really really listened

first, happy birthday phrankenstyne!

Second, damn.

I had no idea what it was like to be listened to, reeeeally listened to. Before tonight that is. And I know it sounds odd, 'cause I'm married to the best man ever, but ms. alariya has a talent for it.

I wonder if this is what my friends felt like when I listened to them... if so, no wonder they soak it up. If not, I need to work on my listening skills, 'cause this is like a drug, and it's so damn good and cleansing. I felt a little guilty, but I just poured it out, and for once it felt received rather than just released. She didn't even respond much, but I knew she wasn't zoning out or thinking about anything else, she was totally focused on me.

I was just the receiver this time; I've never ever ever been that before. (mostly 'cause it's just my pattern to be the giver, so I fall naturally into that role) This is totally new for both of us: she's never approached someone else for a relationship, and I've never been approached. I've discovered that it makes you feel so comfortable when you're the one being approached, because you don't have to worry about whether they really want to spend time with you or are just humoring you.


We curled up together on her bed and watched "Playing By Heart"... she petted my back and hair and just made me feel so loved and comforted... She's the only friend I've ever felt absolutely comfortable cuddling with. I know without any doubt that she's comfortable with being hugged and touched, so I can be comfortable snuggling up against her legs or petting her hair.

And y'know, that movie affects everyone different(ly). (haha, inside "Playing By Heart" joke!) alariya was most touched by the Mildred/Mark relationship, Allison was most touched by the Meredith/Trent relationship, and I of course love the Joan/Keenan relationship. Go see that movie, y'all, it's awesome.

There was more I wanted to say, but "as the british say, 'I'm daggered.'"

P.S. If you haven't yet, please respond to my necklace design poll.

feelings: mmm yeah, look at my song.
sounds: 112: "Peaches and Cream"
connecting: ,

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thesaj ══╣╠══
unfamiliar with said song....but it looked like a happy smiley flirty face....

belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
very sexy song.
mabels ══╣╠══
Ive never cuddled with anyone other than maybe my parents when I was little...and James of course.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
Well, I don't know how important physical touch is to you... but it's essential to me. I can't live without it.
darkpool ══╣╠══
Cuddling is good.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
true dat!
acid_burns ══╣╠══
I love cuddling.
belenen ══╣gentle╠══
it's so wonderful, isn't it?
ravensfeather ══╣BrightEyes╠══
mmm.... sounds extrememly comforting! I love cuddling.. it's the best feeling.

I don't know if you have replies to your comments sent to email or not.. but if you didn't, I replied to your comment in my journal, and just wanted to post it here as well, since I hadn't heard anything back from you? It was in the post where I put up pics of myself, and you said you like the last one best.

hey, thanks! ^_^ hey you're a model, right? yeah. Well... how do you start off doing that? I mean, I don't want to be like a runway supa-chic glam model or anything... I want to model for.. like fantasy art or something. like for boris & julie, or luis royo, or olivia. that sort of... sexy art thing, women with wings, etc etc.

how the heck does one go about doing that?
if you know a lot about it and would rather chat thru email.. corrosivekiss@yahoo.com

So... yeah. ^_^ Just in case you hadn't seen that... figured I'd post it in your journal.
belenen ══╣artistic╠══
well, the first step would be www.onemodelplace.com -- it's a huuuuuuuge site for photographers and models to hook up -- put in your profile that you are willing to work tfp (time for print (or tfcd, time for cd of shots)-- they get a free model, you get to share rights to the photos) to get your portfolio developed, and I am sure you'll get tons of responses. You don't have to put up professional ones to get responses either, just some plain shots that show your face and figure, and then as you build a portfolio you can replace them. It's free, and you can upgrade for a fee. I've had plenty of response from my free account though.

All I've done came from that site.
jaafar ══╣╠══
Hey I love your background. I think itz pretty kool. ciao bella
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
ex_alariya46 ══╣╠══
I've never had more unselfish fun in my whole life. :)

And as for the old man, remember C.S. Lewis' dwarves.
belenen ══╣giggling╠══
*mwuah* right back!
individuality ══╣╠══
I'm English and honestly I've never heard the expression "I'm daggered" before in my life.

where did you hear it?
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
the whole sentence was a quote from a movie -- on of the characters said, "Well, as the british say, I'm daggered."
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.