May 2018
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dream (meeting and being close with Eve)

For some reason I went to my bioparent's GA house and walked around the neighborhood -- then saw another car of the same make and model as mine (in my dream it was burgandy), and thought to myself, "huh, that could be Eve's car." Then Eve got out of the car and I was excited but nervous. I wasn't sure if she'd recognize me or not, so I didn't run up and hug her, even though I wanted to. Instead I walked up and said hi, and she turned and looked at me and then I saw her recognize me so I went up and hugged her. It was more like old friends meeting after a long absence than two lj friends meeting for the first time -- and the hug was so genuine. Not short, not awkward like I had expected it to be. And there was something sad about it -- like I was comforting her about something.
Afterward I started helping them (evileve and scourge) move in, oddly enough into my parents' old house. It didn't take very long (obviously a dream), so we just sat and talked together for a while... unfortunately the details are fuzzy, but I remember talking about Lilith and a lot of other subjects.

The dream was so vivid emotionally that now I miss her, and feel comfortable saying all of this even though yesterday I'd have felt a little awkward since I don't really know how she feels about me. The dream-feeling convinces me that she understands and loves me.

feelings: loved
sounds: Portishead: "It Could Be Sweet"
connecting: , ,

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evileve ══╣╠══
Yes, I do understand...and yes I do feel love and caring for you.
It is weird, because of how we have grown to know each other, but valid nonetheless.

I can't wait to hug you for the first time.
belenen ══╣beautiful╠══
aww, I can't wait either! That made me very happy.
scourge ══╣stiletto╠══
Oddly, my credit report shows I'm buying a house in Woodstock, even though I've never been there....cept maybe passing thru on the way to Canton. I should prolly investigate that someday.
belenen ══╣eccentric╠══
huh -- odd. o.0
mimimandy ══╣╠══
eh. I relate a lot to your dream. When I first got an internet connection, I did mesage boards and got close to this girl named Tania. But things happened and she just disappeared one day. I still miss her a lot.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
yeah... it's bad when you lose an internet friend because you aren't as likely to meet them again as you would a face-to-face friend.
aubkabob ══╣╠══
i always dream about my old neighborhood, specifically where i lived until age 8, monticello, iowa. it always leads me to believe that i MUST go back there, to banish old ghosts... i found a website for it online, that had pictures and stuff. seeing the old playground where i played in kindergarted and first grade, with the same tree with white bark that i wrapped my arms around... i almost cried. the lump got bigger when i saw the church where i went to preschool. it was almost All Over when i saw the library next to raisin's house where we used to play when we were 6 and 8...
belenen ══╣gentle╠══
I don't think I've ever dreamed about being at other old houses before, now that you mention it. Just the one in Woodstock. It was a tempestuous time, which is probably why it pops up in my mind. The other houses seem so far away it's like I never really lived there. Even the trailer we lived in (that I looooved because of the woods I could play in) never comes up in my dreams.
aubkabob ══╣╠══
come to think of it, i never really dream much of places i used to live, other than the small town in iowa,and almost never old houses, which surprises me. i've lived in so many other places, so many other lives so to speak, that there MUST be something up with that era for my subconscious to keep focusing on that particular area.

wow, i think that's one of my biggest dreams as far as a place to call permanent home: something with woods nearby. and mountains. i need mountains. i remember as a young adult, when i had just turned 18, when i almost moved into a trailor outside of town... wasn't overly nice by ANY means, but it had woods out back, and a little stream that separated the trailor from the woods. i still feel peace whenever i think of that place, although i had never been able to officially call it Home.
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
I love the woods but hate the mountains -- they tend to be too far away from civilization (I need my Starbucks and beading stores!) and I relate them with hiking, which I also hate (my parents used to make me go hiking on mountains, the most boring, taxing thing ever to me).

But woods, yes. I want to somehow get about 10 acres or so very near to ATL, and live in the middle of it. A little island of woods on the skirts of a busy city, that's my dream. And all fenced in.
aubkabob ══╣╠══
I don't really like hiking, either, but I like EXPLORING. If it were utterly safe for me, I would love to lose myself in the woods for hours and just BE, just EXPERIENCE.

I love living in a place that has both mountains and REAL forests. phoenix had mountains, but they were all brown and dry. and since it's washington state, you certainly get enough starbucks around here :)

I was also able to repierce my ears today and have been wearing the fallen leaves pair you sent me, with little to no discomfort. Because I can't wear them to bed without fear of losing or breaking them, I picked up a pair of 24k coated hypoallergenic piercing posts at Sally's today, so I can see about making sure they heal completely this time, instead of instantly swell shut the second I take these out.

I say little to no discomfort, as my right earlobe, the one that I had to completely repierce again, seemed to stick to the hook in a way.. it would let me turn it back and forth, but was too tight to move in and out, if that makes any sense, whereas the other one was fine.

we'll see how it plays itself out :D thanks again!
belenen ══╣earrings╠══
ahh, I'm into exploring too. There's this one mountain in GA that I love, it always has perfect weather, and it's just beautiful, so lush. (and I usually hate climbing even a hill, so that's pretty amazing that I love it)

YAY on the earrings! It sounds like the right one just needs to heal properly. ;-)
aubkabob ══╣╠══
OOoh, and while I've got you here, in an old post, I know that you like violet and dragonflies, but what about Ashley? I'm putting together some *cough* stuff and want to include some stuff for her. You're easy to create things for :D

But, shh. Don't tell you. It's a secret.
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
First, a circle:

Hmm... Well, Ashley isn't as obsessive as I am... but she loves anything sparkly, anything to do with renaissance, anything bright red... hm. You might actually do pretty well emailing Kevin (thx712517).

And I won't tell Ash or Bel, but you are so sweet! They're going to be so surprised and excited!
aubkabob ══╣╠══
Ooh, goodie. Sounds like Ash is a lot like me, I love shiny and glittery things, though I'm much more a dark purple person than a bright red, though I do go through phases where I obsess over 'gem tones' or primary colors.

This makes my project much easier, thank you :)
aubkabob ══╣╠══
i also need to put my piercing studs i picked up back in my ears so that i can more easily wear your earrings at will. i'm dumb and keep taking the studs out (because they're so difficult to remove, i almost never get them back in...)
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.