September 3rd, 2005


self-confidence milestone (body image)

I went to Wal-Mart the other day, and at the customer service desk I chatted with the girls for a bit, about my much shorter hair, and other things. Then one girl asks me,

"Are you pregnant?"

Slight pause, I laugh a little and say no, and she gets that look on her face that says omg-I-can't-believe-I-did-that. Then she says, "Are you sure?" and I say casually, "No, I'm just bloated" (on the first day of my period all my ab muscles refuse to work at all) and then the other girl changes the subject.

And I didn't even feel self-conscious. Read that sentence a few times! I didn't even suck it in! I wasn't angry, I wasn't worried that I looked 'fat,' I didn't go home and cry, or even stress about how I looked. That's me almost being totally okay with having a round belly! Almost completely unconcerned with how others see me!

Reflecting on this, I feel like I own the universe. Because I do. The power to create life rests within the belly of the woman, and what greater power is there?

My wonderful darling lovely shespoke gave me "The Woman's Belly Book," can you tell? I only did the breathing exercises once so far, and that once was enough to change my life. I'm going to make it a part of every day. I started treating my body with respect and deliberately accepting my belly, standing in front of the mirror and caressing it and (don't laugh) complimenting it. And my sex drive shot up! I don't know yet if my belly is actually the home of my spirit, as the book seems to imply, but I have certainly experienced a positive change. I'm definitely going to keep using this book.
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