March 2018
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coffee & conversation with Michael and Laura!

Just before Christmas I met up with Michael, a friend from high school. It had been 2 years since we'd seen each other, and about four years since we had had a real conversation, so I was nervous but excited. Then 30 minutes before we're supposed to meet, he calls up to make sure of the directions, and mentions that he'd bringing his girlfriend along. Not asks -- tells me. I was so shocked that I didn't really react (and he hurried on talking) -- then when I got off the phone, it sank in and I was Pissed. It's been FOUR YEARS and he is bringing a complete stranger? I was so close to canceling, but I finally decided that the worst that could happen was that I would have yummy coffee, be bored and awkward for 30 minutes and then find an excuse to leave. The coffee was really the deciding factor.

I had no idea that his girlfriend would actually be interesting -- he's always had questionable taste before. I was expecting a shallow, snobby unhealthily-skinny blonde with no backbone. Well, Laura was blonde but other than that she was the complete opposite of my expectations. She's a voluptuous curvygirl! Which impressed me, 'cause that means that Michael now has a healthier view on beauty. And she's spunky and a deep thinker and very friendly.

After we were introduced, we went back to the green couch (damn I love that couch), and Laura went up to order a coffee. I took the opportunity to sketch out for Michael the last two years of my life and my earthshattering changes (I had told him before that I had something important that I wanted to talk to him about, but that I wanted to tell him in person) -- he was very respectful and caring. Then he told me that he had thought that Ben and I were getting a divorce when I had sent him that email (omg!), and that he had talked about it with Laura and SHE suggested that perhaps I had gotten a sex change! We laughed about that -- but that explains why Laura insisted on coming along -- if I was in her shoes and I thought that a girl that Michael had been so close with was single, I sure as hell would have insisted on being there. Michael and I used to be very close, though it was never a romantic or sexual relationship.

So the three of us talked about philosophy, politics, art, relationships... it was SO much fun. Michael and I argued, and I remembered why I used to enjoy it so much. We never belittle each other's ideas, and I know that no matter what my opinion is, he's not going to feel any differently about me and vice versa. So we can battle and know that we aren't going to come out wounded -- it's fencing rather than swordfighting. Laura wasn't a third wheel, either -- the three of us really had balanced conversation, it was amazing.

Then at the end, we started talking about relationships and I ended up kinda counseling them -- ironic since I haven't been having the best marriage lately, but I know what works even if Ben and I aren't doing it at the time. I hope Michael didn't feel attacked, I tried to make it plain that I didn't think any less of him. The opposite is true -- apparently they have broken up and gotten back together several times in the year that they've been together, which I think is real maturity, since they're working out problems instead of throwing away an imperfect relationship.

We talked for about three solid hours. I love the new me! able to just be comfortable with a friend whom I haven't seen in years and a perfect stranger. Laura's actually a person I'd like to be friends with, but sadly she's on myspace *shudder* instead of LJ. But I'm going to try to be in touch somehow or another. And at some point we're going to have to go on a double date. When we finally parted, I hugged them both. I really really really hope they stay together, I think they fit together so well. And Michael said he'd check out my journal -- so are you reading this??? eh? I've been trying to get him to read it since I made it, but he's always been completely disinterested before -- this time he actually showed interest. So Michael, if you're reading this, extounding. I'm going to ask you, so remember that I said that!

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kevloid2006 ══╣╠══
it amuses me that you tagged 'the green couch' :-)

if I was him I woulda brought the girlfriend too, because in a lot of relationships going alone to meet you would mean a guaranteed fight with the girlfriend later. :-p
eternitywaiting ══╣morgan's little me╠══
What amuses me is that I can be found under the "green couch" tag. *giggle* I sat on that couch! Ha!

Yeah, I'm in a weird mood.
kevloid2006 ══╣╠══
holy shit there IS more than one reference to it. O.o

I must see a picture of the legendary green couch.
belenen ══╣wild╠══
I must take a photo! Why did I not think of that!
belenen ══╣vivacious╠══
and you will sit on it again!!!!
belenen ══╣amused╠══
That green couch is famous in my small circle. ;-D
shaybe ══╣╠══
just a thought...
i know sometimes it can be awkward etting to know a new sig other of a friend.. and i'm glad she surpassed your expectations... just a thought though from her end... I went through kind of a trying time recently where there was this girl who was obsessed with my fiance.. and they were friends... and she never wanted to hang with Rob...and me.. just Rob... She kept trying to get him to come over to her dorm.. now I know that its not at all the same situation.. but from a girlfriend perspective she might have seen it as that a little and wanted to get to know yop so her mind would be at ease... for me it didnt get solved till i cornered her at school and introduced myself and made it clear that i would not allow her to destroy what we had.... long story short ... she dissapeared....
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
Re: just a thought...
Well I totally understood her feelings -- and I get yours too! I was only angry because Michael didn't let me know ahead of time and ask if I would still want to meet. But it's all good. ;-)
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.