I'm in love with zir presence, zir hands, zir smile, zir voice, zir laugh. Oh, incredible, unfathomable loveliness.
And let this be a lesson unto me -- I cannot at ALLLLLL tell from internet presence if I will not feel a connection in person. I can tell sometimes when I will, but I cannot at all predict if I will not. When I was friends with Aurilion online, I wasn't drawn to zir at all because ze didn't share much online -- but over the phone I could feel it somewhat, and I felt it instantly upon meeting zir. I wasn't drawn at all to Viv's online presence either (I'm intellectually drawn to people who know themselves really well and share copiously), but OH MY GOD/DESS in person. Which is why I lament that I haven't met all of you in person because I've no idea if it would open up a whole new realm of closeness!
And thank you, universe, for breaking me up with Aurilion and giving me the sense not to pursue the sexist person that I was drawn to for zir spirit, because those two things are the reason I was in an actively-seeking place and invited Viv along. ;-) I'm so insanely happy right now and I don't care if it doesn't last, it is beautiful enough as a moment ♥
ETA: I've practically been holding my breath for the past 12 hours since I sent zir a message *rolls eyes at self* ze finally responded so now maybe I can go to sleep. OMG I'm so fucking insane :-p