April 2018
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job quitting and new job training / plans w Wade / Ben & Anita & Green & Chip & Christa energy flow


I'm in a weird state at the moment. I put my notice in at my current job because one way or another I'm going to be moving away from it. I have training for a new job on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday and I'm very nervous about it, especially since I'm supposed to dress professionally and I have only the most vague idea what that means but I think I'll probably have to buy uncomfy shoes and fancy knee-highs (because there is no way in HELL I am wearing pantyhose). Ughhhhhhh I HATE wearing such things. And this job is so grown-up compared to everything I've done before and it sounds too good to be true (except for the dressing 'up') and all of this just makes me SO NERVOUS. And even though I was accepted for the job it feels way too easy and I keep waiting for the catch. Suppose I'll find out in a few days if there is one.

Also I'm hanging out with Wade tomorrow and I'm happy and nervous about that. Wade is Rob's housemate -- I've only really talked with zir once but it was a wonderful conversation and we cuddled a bit and that was even more wonderful so I think it'll go well. I feel a little ridiculous opening all these doors when I don't know anything about the direction my life is taking, but intuition says go, so going I am. (and I did ask the universe for as many lovers as I can handle... haha)

The borderpagans meeting tonight consisted of myself, Ben, Green, Anita, Chip, and Christa. Something about that collection of people felt just amazing. I mean, it could have been that I was just high from being around both Ben and Anita but I think it was more than that -- the energy just seemed to flow really easily between the six of us. I really loved it -- even before we went to dinner and Anita and I cuddled, hee (there are these moments when we're not even touching and I just feel this wave of lush calm from being in zir presence -- it's incredible). I think maybe it's that I felt like I could really trust each of them and that each of them were open to connecting with me and the others. And also that I really like each of them and want to know them more so I was very open to them.

It completely blows my mind that there are so many amazing people in my life. Such an abundance of love and acceptance and generosity of spirit! I am incredibly grateful.

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Comments
n3e ══╣╠══
Jobs
Uncomfortable shoes and thigh-highs aside, the nervousness over the job will fade eventually. Still, congratulations on the new job! Even if it's too good to be true it's a new step :D

hopeful
belenen ══╣hopeful╠══
Re: Jobs
thanks! ;-) I'm really hoping it works out.
Fractal - Heart
celestialsight ══╣Fractal - Heart╠══
Good luck with the job. May it be everything you hope for and then some! New job, new loves, how exciting!
effervescent
belenen ══╣effervescent╠══
thank you! I know, so much excitement I think I may burst!
writer_lilies ══╣╠══
Wow. I think pantyhose are universally hated.
ewwwww
belenen ══╣ewwwww╠══
I would hope so! rotten things. Either they're trying to smash my belly or they're trying to slither down my thighs :-p
(Anonymous) ══╣╠══
Hey sweetheart, I wouldn't buy uncomfy shoes-- if you get stuck at that job you'll have to walk in them all the time. If you need to get new shoes, it's usually easy to find a pair of professional looking loafers or something that look slick but are still traversable. Good luck at the interview!! <3 <3 <3
eccentric
belenen ══╣eccentric╠══
is this Leah? You should so get an LJ so you can comment with a face ;-)

I don't mean really uncomfy, just uncomfy compared to my sketchers. :-p Yuckkk at shoes one cannot run in.

Not that I ever run because that involves holding my boobs, haha.
lorelei_sakti ══╣╠══
I can't wait to hear about your new job! Good luck with training.
clown_frog ══╣╠══
Congratulations on putting in notice! (sometimes it is a very positive thing...) And MASSIVE congratulations on being accepted for the too-good-to-be-true job!! I hope there is no catch... other than dressing professionally. Dressing professionally SUCKS. Good luck finding comfy work shoes... I hate shoe shopping so you have my deepest depths of sympathy. Also on the pantyhose (wot we call "tights" in our un-poetic British way), I used to hate them when I was younger. I wear them now because stockings fall down and I cannot find any damn trousers that are smart enough for work without annoying the hell out of me for one reason or another. But I get extra long ones so I don't have the hobbled-by-crotch thing going on.

What is the job? I want to know! Too good to be true sounds intriguing :-) Am I going to be jealous?

Wonderful cuddly people! Can't have too much love going on, I guess

theindiequeen ══╣╠══
What is Wade's last name? I know a singer named Wade (in the AWESOME reggae band Wade in the Rhythm). I doubt it's the same guy, but when you said Wade, I immediately thought "Wow, Wade and Bel would be totally awesome!" He's a really cool guy, and all of his lyrics are REALLY spiritual and positive. (Actually, me and my backing band are playing a show with them at Lenny's on the 14th! You should come! Even if you miss us, come see Wade in the Rhythm because they're THAT GOOD.)

Wow, I feel like this comment went in a totally different direction than I thought it would. Haha.
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.