December 2017
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31


accomplished, anxious, angry, could feel better maybe


things that make me feel accomplished right now:
having made at least 3 real friends out of acquaintances in the past 4 months
having broken up with Aurilion
having had productive conversations with Hannah
having written pretty steadily for the past 3 months
having spent more time with Kylei and Heather

things that make me feel anxious right now:
not knowing my final grade for stats this semester :-O
feeling unclear on if I got my assignments all in properly and also afraid of annoying the professor by asking and also pretty sure that I did so it doesn't feel worth it to ask
gardening (it's a deadline even though it isn't a firm one)
the fact that I've asked several professors for recommendation letters and they were all like "yes I'd love to!" and then didn't do it and I didn't respond to it within the time for it to not be awkward
the fact that said recommendation letters are necessary for any scholarship applications
the fact that I'm poor goddammit and need scholarship money
Topaz' stress and recent bout of migraines

things that make me angry right now:
everything
especially the fact that multiple people got to the end of a semester of a GWST class and still made the argument for an inevitable "natural" human urge to other and create hierarchy. Way to not learn a damn thing about human "nature."
also the sexist false narrative of fertilization.

things that would make me feel better (probably) but I feel too ADDfrazzled to do:
fractalling
writing more about TBC
editing photos
making icons
sleeping?
getting something/anything written so that I feel more in charge of my own brain

connecting: , ,

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Comments
classical_wolf ══╣╠══
I hope that more things from your list can go from anxious to accomplished! ♥
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
thanks ;-)
frecklestars ══╣╠══
Curious to hear more about the sexist false narrative of fertilization? Feel better soon.
belenen ══╣gender is a lie╠══
http://discovermagazine.com/1992/jun/theaggressiveegg55
hardigrin ══╣╠══
I'd think that a gentle inquiry to the professors that agreed to write letters of recommendation about whether they're still willing wouldn't be awkward even if a lot of time has passed, unless the deadline for turning in the letters is less than a week from now. I can ask my mom if she has any advice on the best way to approach that next time I talk to her. My guess is that waiting until after grades have been posted is better so that your email doesn't get lost in the waves of end of semesters stress?

Also UGH on people who think "natural" means anything. Glech.

*hugs*

Good luck, and I hope you can find something that makes you feel centered but that you're not too frazzled to do. Going for a walk usually makes me feel accomplished and better, but I have no idea if that'd work for you.

Edit: Went ahead and got a hold of my mom. Her suggestion was:

"James might write to each, individually, and say "I know that you're excruciatingly busy at this time of year, but I wanted to ask about the letter you agreed to write for me. Will you still be able to do that for me? I would appreciate it deeply" or words to that effect, then a reminder of the date, the link (if it's online), or a new copy of the form "for your convenience."

And said that going ahead and doing it now made more sense than waiting.

"Reassure James, too, that just like students post on FB about getting things done by 11:59 on the deadline, so do professors.

If they said they'd "love to," they probably would still love to if given the chance, and as long as James makes sure to say that "I know you're excruciatingly busy" part, and reminds politely about the details. Happens all the time.

It's more difficult if James never actually gave them the forms or links and the deadline is fast approaching, but that's not unheard of either.

The only time I've heard folks complain and grumble is when someone comes at them sounding all entitled and wants it by tomorrow."

(Oh, and dunno if I've even mentioned it often enough that you remember, but the reason I wanted her advice is that she teaches at UGA and writes several letters for people every year.)
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
thanks for this, it was reassuring! I'm gonna take that advice on board.
llama_friendly ══╣╠══
Could you gently nudge your professors by sending them an e-mail? Possibly with the exact reason you need the recommendation letters and what date you'll be using them? This was suggested by a past co-worker of mine because she also had a problem with professors being totally willing to write them but forgetting. They can be incredibly valuable so I hope you are able to get them!

Also, I hope to get to know you better since I am back on this lj. Sorry for the hiatus!
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
yeah I think I'm going to do that, I was worried it would be rude but the consensus seems to be that it wouldn't be.

no problem!
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.