Belenen (belenen) wrote,
Belenen
belenen

on commenting: my ideal, what I dislike / how I comment / LJ is making changes, willy-nilly

My ideal comment is interactive: where you engage with what I've written. This can be through sharing something about yourself that my entry made you reflect on (#1 favorite), or sharing your emotional response to the post, or disagreeing with something I've said, or asking for clarification about something, or asking a question that delves deeper into what I've written (not all of my posts are worthy of interactive comments, heh). Expressing your care for me is always wonderful too. I do appreciate any comment that you take the time to make, because it lets me know that you are reading and you value my words. I do not expect comments on my posts or replies to comments I leave: they're a bonus. So please never feel guilty or anything for not commenting, and if I commented something that you don't feel a desire to respond to, feel free to skip it.

There is only one kind of comment I actively dislike, and that is unrequested advice. Please, never say "you should do ___" because it will make me feel disrespected, like you think that you can make better choices for me than I can. Feel free to tell me about similar experiences, but don't assume that I haven't already tried the thing you're thinking of. Also, if I ever give you unrequested advice, feel free to tell me off about it -- I won't get defensive, I'll just apologize and try to do better. I try not to give unrequested advice, but sometimes I yield to the impulse! which is why I understand when others do it, even though I don't like it.

On other people's posts, I tend to comment only if I have something to say, so if all I can think of is "I see" or "I agree" or "huh, interesting" then I probably won't comment. But I do read, carefully. On comments on my journal, I always INTEND to comment back but it tends to not happen in any kind of timely manner, and once it's old enough I don't do it at all. I want to get better at this because some of the comments I REALLY want to respond to. I need to let myself skip some comments instead of being fixated on doing them in order. I very much read and appreciate your responses though!

LJ is asking for feedback about a potential 'like'ing system. My response: people who have something to say will still comment. This allows people to show that they read it even if they don't have anything meaningful to add. I would much appreciate this and I think my friends list would too. and I think you should call it a "nod." That's the emotional feel of it.

I would love to get 'nods' on my post to let me know who read it and appreciated it. LOVE LOVE. I used to have a tracker that I could sorta kinda use that way but this would be much more accurate. If you agree please go over there and add your voice -- they put this post up YESTERDAY but the first commenters were negative so they're scrapping the idea, wtf.

(there is also a place to give feedback on the site redesign -- which they are planning on forcing! switching back is only because it is in beta! please tell them NO.)
Tags: comments, communication / words, lj my beloved home
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