October 2018
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PSA: use of ableist slurs will cause me to unfriend you


icon: "snarling (photo of a snow leopard in profile, snarling)"

PSA: if you want to stay on my friends list you're gonna have to avoid slurs, especially ableist slurs, because there are only so many I can take. If you don't care that use of these words/concepts hurts me and many other people, you are bad at empathy and I don't want to be your friend. I am happy to give you the benefit of the doubt and point this out once, maybe twice, possibly more if you respond well when I mention it and seem to not have realized, but really, you need to do the work of thinking about your language.

This includes: [TW: ableist slurs]
------TW: slurs-----
stupid, lame, mong, idiot, dumb, idiot, retard, derp, mongoloid, and all variations, such as stupidity, monging, idiotic, dumbass, retarded, derpy, 'special', short bus, etc.
---- end slur list-----


ANYTHING that refers to the idea of "less intelligence" in a non-positive way.

Also, anything that implies mental illness is inherently bad, or uses mental illness as adjectives for their lives or for things they don't like. for instance, "the weather is bipolar" "my mother-in-law is crazy" "I'm totally manic" (if you don't actually experience the mental state of mania, and no that doesn't just mean hyper and happy).

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Comments
(Anonymous) ══╣╠══
lilywolfsolomon ══╣╠══
And others who may not say anything or be vocal about it but who these words still hurt. <3
zimtkeks ══╣╠══
I consider myself more PC than many people I meet, but I honestly never thought about words like "stupid" or "idiot", and I might even use "crazy" the wrong way. I will try to remember these.
Thank you.
lilywolfsolomon ══╣╠══
What about "The weather is crazy"? I don't use the word myself but wonder if I'm too sensitive to it. As a word to describe something, not someone, is it a slur?
garrulous
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
yes, a slur is a word with derogatory meaning which depends on the undesirability of a group of people to have that connotation. It doesn't matter if it is being used against a person or situation.
z8z8 ══╣╠══
As a blind person, it drives me crazy how people throw that term around for all kinds of things
It's also a subject in many songs as I think people recognize just how fucked up it is to be blind and music is quite the emotional release
garrulous
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
yes! if it isn't my experience, it's not my metaphor to use. I wish artists would take this seriously.
hawkmoon
meri_sielu ══╣hawkmoon╠══
I get what you mean, I personally can't stand the casual use of OCD or "I'm so stressed I'm tearing my hair out" as that is a problem very personal to me and it's not very nice to joke about in my eyes. I've gotten a lot better about the sort of words I use.... I think on that list I seem to only use 'stupid' but to describe actions, not as a slur on people. I will try very hard to be clear and more careful in my posts and certainly when addressing you. <3
garrulous
belenen ══╣garrulous╠══
I appreciate that effort! thank you <3

to clarify, slurs are still a problem when they are used about situations or actions, because they're still reinforcing the idea that a certain group of people is less worthy. So, if someone calls a situation 'gay' or an action 'stupid' when they find the situation/action upsetting and undesirable, they're (unintentionally) implying that anyone who is put in those categories is also upsetting and undesirable just for existing. This is one of those effects that's mostly subsconscious, usually. But it has very real consequences.
chillychilly22 ══╣╠══
Fortunately I don't use a lot of those words to begin with, but the ones that I do... ugh, I never realized how much I used "crazy", "insane", and "stupid" until I tried not to use them.

Will do my best!
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.