October 2018
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lj cleanup / need a home weekend regularly


icon: "slytherin (a closeup of the Slytherin crest: a rearing silver serpent in front of a green background patterned in stylized waves of water and plush upholstery)"

Yesterday I finally went through my flist and removed inactive journals and journals of people who I never really interacted with and who didn't interact with me, or who I never really clicked with. If I unfriended you and you still use your LJ to read, let me know.

I'm hoping this will help me keep up with my current friends better, because with the last two months getting absolutely swallowed by stress, I just haven't been able to read half as often as I wish. I'm trying to catch up now.

I've realized that even though I spend all my weeknights at home now, I still never get any real alone time because my evenings after work, workout, and commute are about 2.5 hours long and I need literally all of that time to get my brain to relax (through watching netflix/hulu) and then get ready for bed. So I need to make one weekend a month a stay-at-home weekend and I need to actually follow through and do it. Yesterday was the first full day I have had at home in months and months (unless you count sick days, which I don't).

I feel like I have been just surviving for a long time now, and my life feels mostly pointless. I feel like I am not doing anything except work, spending time with Topaz, and family-in-love events. That's not where I want all of my time to be going. I talked about this with Topaz, who felt like we don't do much family stuff but for me, more than twice a year is a LOT. I told Topaz that I need to keep it to only 1 family event per month, because it takes all of my social energy and then I have none for my friendships or for community.

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Comments
christina_maria ══╣╠══
I just did that recently as well, sometimes a little clean up helps.

Sorry you've been buried in stress lately. I hope that settles down for you soon. I've been having waves of feeling like that as well. It sucks.
I've read that adding or changing up something small in your routine can help. So doing a stay-at-home weekend might be a huge help in making you feel better. ((hugs)) Good luck.
Cancer
cactus_rs ══╣Cancer╠══
I've been bad at updating and commenting regularly, even though I read multiple times a day. I'm sorry if I've been remiss in commenting anywhere, but I suppose the good news is that there isn't super much you've missed from me because I've been so sketchy in posting. I hope you get your groove back soon!
Original ★ need space
ragnarok_08 ══╣Original ★ need space╠══
I'm sorry that you've been feeling stresses out :(

I hope that things settle for you soon.
fairytaleguise ══╣╠══
I hope implementing your regular day at home goes well and brings you what you need from it.
callmebee ══╣╠══
I feel for you. Not having any time for yourself in the way you specifically need it is really hard. I hope being at home for one weekend a month helps you in big ways.

I have found, lately, that my sociopolitical anxiety has entered a whole new level lately. I am not going to go into detail, but it has been affecting my day-to-day more than usual even when I don't immediately recognize it as that. I knew everything was terrible, but its everywhere on social media and affects me in ways I never knew it would.

Have any of the political issues recently made your day-today more challenging than before?
callmebee ══╣╠══
Also, after thinking about this again I realized that I need to communicate some important needs for privacy in my new living situation. My roommate (who also happens to be my Nana) often has a rotating door of visitors. She likes it most of the time, but I causes me a lot of stress. So I hope I can brainstorm something with her so that we both get our needs met. I just need ONE day off to be a home day without visitors once or twice a month.
hana_broom ══╣╠══
I love spending time on my own watching DVDs and stuff... so I can understand wanting time away from everyone! Hope the stress levels improve *hugs*
ashlaran ══╣╠══
It's a good thing to make time for yourself. Enjoy it! <3
webgirluk ══╣╠══
I feel for you and understand. Work can be such a time/life suck when you add on all the extra commute time. Is it an option to work part time or drop a day a week to give you more time to yourself?
on communication, social justice, intimacy, consent, friendship & other relationships, spirituality, gender, queerness, & dreams. Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.
Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.