Oh yes, and I forgot to post this when it happened, but the last time Ben and I visited them, Spencer held Risa, waved her little hand at me and said to her, "Say 'hi sis!'" When he said that I could feel Paula's surprise, though I didn't look at her. I wanted to hold Risa so badly and I think he woke her up for that very purpose -- but I was sick, and I didn't want to contaminate her.
But when he said that, my heart skipped a beat. I didn't feel utterly delighted, 'cause Spencer may think of me as a daughter, but Paula doesn't, and she's the deciding factor in how close I'm allowed to be to the family. Still, it made me feel warm and accepted. (and made me wonder if Spencer had ever come across my journal and read the entry where I complained that I didn't want to be Risa's 'aunt,' I wanted to be her sister)